Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
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he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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