It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
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