What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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