so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
