she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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