do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
There r osticjed everywhere
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
