I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Randomize