Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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