So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
