Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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