my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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