whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
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