So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Randomize
