I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
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I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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