In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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