She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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