The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
