Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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