my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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