She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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