and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Randomize
