I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Randomize
