Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Randomize
