he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
