i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
