Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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