Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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