You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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