Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Drake has all the answers
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Randomize
