scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize