He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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