M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.