well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
