we have officially lost it.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
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If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
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i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
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