well you can't waste a boner
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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