What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
