your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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