yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Randomize