i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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