watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
