I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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