Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
