Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
