just come out here and I will go home with you...
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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