Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's never too late to be topless.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize