Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
