i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
now i know why i became what i already was.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
