just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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