Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
