can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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